Kipos (Bandra, Mumbai)

Restaurant criticism is clearly a very subjective discipline. I think it’s natural for critics to overlook certain aspects of the food, service or ambience if one area exceedingly compensates.

For example, at Kipos, I really tried hard to find good in the food, for I was loving the DJ spinning 80s classics (Laura Brannigan, Fine Young Cannibals etc) and was strangely enjoying the nightclub-esque feel the place has. The small tables are mere footnotes in the vast warehouse that is Kipos and the quaint mock balconies look completely inapposite against the neon blue glow of the downlighting; however, there was something rather charming about the whole charade.

Yet I could find no redeeming qualities in the food. The hummus on the mezze platter had a peculiar taste to it and made me doubt the freshness of the food being prepared. The pumpkin ravioli was unbecoming because of the sheer size of the ravioli. The veg moussaka filling was acceptable although the bechamel topping was too thick and the fried onions added as a garnish just utterly bizarre and unnecessary (it’s not a Kaukswe from Bu-Sago!).

I almost forget to mention the pomegranate virgin cocktail served in a martini glass which I sampled. It tasted like neat cordial. In fact, you could probably ice pastries with whatever they had added to that glass. The service was efficient, but is that really any consolation when you have eaten food like this?

Last but not least, no halloumi on the menu…need I say more.

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